I had a problem with AVG Free forcing my computer to restart several times a day. It first forced a restart after an update and I didn't pay too much attention, just did the restart. Then the next day I came in and my PC was halted and AVG was requiring a restart. Again, I did it with out worrying about it too much.
The problem got worse over time to where today I had had enough. I came in and it wanted to be restarted. I restarted it and then it immediately wanted restarted again. I restarted the second time and .... you guessed it, it wanted restarted again.
Normally by now, if this were my computer that software would have been replaced with Norton a long time ago. Unfortunately the company requires THAT software. I also have to have my PC running 24/7 so that others can access shared files during the night as needed.
So I went off to the message boards and found that I am not the only one having this problem! Seems it is happening to a lot of people. I had to look for a while before finding a resolution. Most of the people having problems have not yet found a solution so I decided to post this here.
After a lot of digging I found where someone had figured out the problem was a failed update and there is a file left behind. "Program Files\Grisoft\AVG Free\wait4sd". Delete this file and then force an update of your AVG. The problem should resolve itself.
This resolution is approved by Grisoft (note that this was impossible to find until I knew the name of the file and then googled the file name then found the link to Grisoft in a different message board.
"http://www.grisoft.com/ww.faq.num-302#faq_302"
So, hope this helps some other poor soul stuck with this problem....
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
The Bucket Theory and a Bit More About Turkeys
A lot of people have been mentioning this lately. I have a canned explanation of it so thought I might just share in case anyone else was interested.
The question can come in any number of forms. I have heard it as I don’t understand why one day you are so tired you can’t move and the next you are running around fine if you want to(implying that I am faking). I have heard it as you always seem to have so much energy every time I see you. I have heard it as all sorts of variations.
As a child the most common thing I heard relative to my energy level was that it was “as boundless as the ocean” which is probably why THIS version of this explanation sticks in my head. Dorid has her spoon theory, which makes perfect sense to me but I find it easier for me to describe it this way to others.
When we were young children most of us had energy levels that could only be described as almost limitless, we ran around as effortlessly as if we were drawing our energy from the ocean. We would recharge in no time flat and be back at it again. As we age, this level drops off at some point. We get to be teens and young adults and the energy source is more like a swimming pool. For most adult people the level stabilizes somewhere around “rain barrel”. Those of us who battle chronic illness (be it mental or physical), excessive stress, or any combination of these our energy source is more like a bucket.
You see when you are child, everything you need to do requires a ladle full of “water” from that source to fuel it. You have an entire ocean full so you can “dip” into over and over again with very little impact. As you age, you need longer to refill it but it still pretty much is unlimited. Those of us in the last category find that we have to be careful with how often we “dip” out of that bucket or we run the risk of running out.
You see, the reason we only have a bucket worth of energy in the first place is because your body can only generate so much energy. When you are young it generates so much it takes the ocean to hold it but when your body is working less than optimally it can only generate enough to barely fill that bucket.
There is yet another catch, that is that because your body is working less than optimally things that a normal person does on one “dip” might take you two or even three “dips” out of your bucket. You have plan carefully when and how much you “dip” or you find yourself running out. When your bucket runs dry, that is the day that you just can’t even find the energy to get out of bed. Those are the days when it hurts just to breathe.
In my case, I push the limits of my bucket pretty hard. I do this knowing that there will be a price to pay but I refuse to slow down just to conserve my bucket. I would rather live what life I have. Every little thing I do takes a “dip” out of that bucket, on top of that things like stress also take a “dip”. I find that certain things, while they take extra “dips” have a reward in that they give back more “dips” than they take. Going to the beach takes a fair amount of energy but is gives me back a lot more. Hanging out with the band costs me in terms of rest and energy but it gives me back almost a full bucket every time. The trick is to learn to balance these things.
In general I do a fair job of balancing my bucket load. Then there are days when someone comes along and tips my bucket. I get a turkey stressing me out. I get unexpected things that hit hard. Those all take a toll on my bucket and I might suddenly find myself low on reserves. I will cut back on a lot of things and try to make it through but there are things that HAVE to be done. I have to go to work, I have to take care of my pets, I have to be sure everyone including myself is fed, and things like that. I can’t cut those out so you try to adapt. Sometimes you make it and hardly anyone notices. Sometimes you can’t adapt enough and you have a day where you simply can’t get out of bed. Those are the days when people notice.
That is my bucket theory. I hope it helps understand a bit what some of us are going through. You have great days where you are on top of everything and not so great days and then there are the days where you simply appear to fall off the planet.
I want to mention too that there is an added tie in to this. This sort of came up yesterday because there is another factor. Yesterday I had one of those days that stressed my bucket. Well to be honest, it was a few days of bucket stress.
It started on Saturday. Some turkey came along and stressed me out. I knew I had to start conservation mode but I also already made promises that needed to be kept.
Sunday came and I was in full conservation mode…. You guessed it, turkey number two came along and took a big old drink out of my bucket.
Monday saw me still in full conservation mode and barely able to pull myself out of bed and off to work. I had that big meeting I talked about which should have been a bigger “dip” than it was. This was because of the effect of the guys helping me out like they did. I went home somewhat even thinking I had done good. Then along came turkey number three. He dumped my bucket over.
Tuesday after about 12 ours sleep I dragged myself out of bed and made my way to work. I mentioned above that days like this most people hardly notice. There are people though who DO notice. This is where that tie in comes in. I had just finished passing out those treats and thank yous to the guys and was standing in the hall outside my office. One of the guys who is not particularly close to me walked up and patted my shoulder. He gave it a small squeeze and said, “it will be alright, thanks for everything”, and then walked away. That little boost gave my bucket the few needed “dips” to get through the rest of the workday. I got home running on fumes and got hit with yet another turkey. It almost did me in. In fact, I failed to keep a promise and it was noticed. It prompted a call. The call wasn’t to demand the promise be kept but rather concern that since I ALWAYS keep promises something must be wrong. The person was quick to point out how appreciated it is that I DO but that when I don’t it is no big deal. That call helped me out a bit actually that call and the follow up to it helped me immensely. I was able to get through the night.
Today I woke somewhat better. My bucket right now is a bit below half full but I will make it through the day. What is keeping me going today though? The thought that tonight, I will throw caution and my bucket to the wind to go see that band knowing that they will refill that bucket.
This ties back to yesterday too. People made a difference in my bucket levels. They didn’t do anything huge, they just let me know that they noticed and that it mattered to them. So beyond just understanding the bucket theory…. Understand that there are times when the simple act of acknowledging someone’s distress can make a major impact on the level of their bucket. Be aware that this works the other way too…. If you stress someone by recognizing the problem AS a negative, it will further reduce their levels and make the problem worse.
The question can come in any number of forms. I have heard it as I don’t understand why one day you are so tired you can’t move and the next you are running around fine if you want to(implying that I am faking). I have heard it as you always seem to have so much energy every time I see you. I have heard it as all sorts of variations.
As a child the most common thing I heard relative to my energy level was that it was “as boundless as the ocean” which is probably why THIS version of this explanation sticks in my head. Dorid has her spoon theory, which makes perfect sense to me but I find it easier for me to describe it this way to others.
When we were young children most of us had energy levels that could only be described as almost limitless, we ran around as effortlessly as if we were drawing our energy from the ocean. We would recharge in no time flat and be back at it again. As we age, this level drops off at some point. We get to be teens and young adults and the energy source is more like a swimming pool. For most adult people the level stabilizes somewhere around “rain barrel”. Those of us who battle chronic illness (be it mental or physical), excessive stress, or any combination of these our energy source is more like a bucket.
You see when you are child, everything you need to do requires a ladle full of “water” from that source to fuel it. You have an entire ocean full so you can “dip” into over and over again with very little impact. As you age, you need longer to refill it but it still pretty much is unlimited. Those of us in the last category find that we have to be careful with how often we “dip” out of that bucket or we run the risk of running out.
You see, the reason we only have a bucket worth of energy in the first place is because your body can only generate so much energy. When you are young it generates so much it takes the ocean to hold it but when your body is working less than optimally it can only generate enough to barely fill that bucket.
There is yet another catch, that is that because your body is working less than optimally things that a normal person does on one “dip” might take you two or even three “dips” out of your bucket. You have plan carefully when and how much you “dip” or you find yourself running out. When your bucket runs dry, that is the day that you just can’t even find the energy to get out of bed. Those are the days when it hurts just to breathe.
In my case, I push the limits of my bucket pretty hard. I do this knowing that there will be a price to pay but I refuse to slow down just to conserve my bucket. I would rather live what life I have. Every little thing I do takes a “dip” out of that bucket, on top of that things like stress also take a “dip”. I find that certain things, while they take extra “dips” have a reward in that they give back more “dips” than they take. Going to the beach takes a fair amount of energy but is gives me back a lot more. Hanging out with the band costs me in terms of rest and energy but it gives me back almost a full bucket every time. The trick is to learn to balance these things.
In general I do a fair job of balancing my bucket load. Then there are days when someone comes along and tips my bucket. I get a turkey stressing me out. I get unexpected things that hit hard. Those all take a toll on my bucket and I might suddenly find myself low on reserves. I will cut back on a lot of things and try to make it through but there are things that HAVE to be done. I have to go to work, I have to take care of my pets, I have to be sure everyone including myself is fed, and things like that. I can’t cut those out so you try to adapt. Sometimes you make it and hardly anyone notices. Sometimes you can’t adapt enough and you have a day where you simply can’t get out of bed. Those are the days when people notice.
That is my bucket theory. I hope it helps understand a bit what some of us are going through. You have great days where you are on top of everything and not so great days and then there are the days where you simply appear to fall off the planet.
I want to mention too that there is an added tie in to this. This sort of came up yesterday because there is another factor. Yesterday I had one of those days that stressed my bucket. Well to be honest, it was a few days of bucket stress.
It started on Saturday. Some turkey came along and stressed me out. I knew I had to start conservation mode but I also already made promises that needed to be kept.
Sunday came and I was in full conservation mode…. You guessed it, turkey number two came along and took a big old drink out of my bucket.
Monday saw me still in full conservation mode and barely able to pull myself out of bed and off to work. I had that big meeting I talked about which should have been a bigger “dip” than it was. This was because of the effect of the guys helping me out like they did. I went home somewhat even thinking I had done good. Then along came turkey number three. He dumped my bucket over.
Tuesday after about 12 ours sleep I dragged myself out of bed and made my way to work. I mentioned above that days like this most people hardly notice. There are people though who DO notice. This is where that tie in comes in. I had just finished passing out those treats and thank yous to the guys and was standing in the hall outside my office. One of the guys who is not particularly close to me walked up and patted my shoulder. He gave it a small squeeze and said, “it will be alright, thanks for everything”, and then walked away. That little boost gave my bucket the few needed “dips” to get through the rest of the workday. I got home running on fumes and got hit with yet another turkey. It almost did me in. In fact, I failed to keep a promise and it was noticed. It prompted a call. The call wasn’t to demand the promise be kept but rather concern that since I ALWAYS keep promises something must be wrong. The person was quick to point out how appreciated it is that I DO but that when I don’t it is no big deal. That call helped me out a bit actually that call and the follow up to it helped me immensely. I was able to get through the night.
Today I woke somewhat better. My bucket right now is a bit below half full but I will make it through the day. What is keeping me going today though? The thought that tonight, I will throw caution and my bucket to the wind to go see that band knowing that they will refill that bucket.
This ties back to yesterday too. People made a difference in my bucket levels. They didn’t do anything huge, they just let me know that they noticed and that it mattered to them. So beyond just understanding the bucket theory…. Understand that there are times when the simple act of acknowledging someone’s distress can make a major impact on the level of their bucket. Be aware that this works the other way too…. If you stress someone by recognizing the problem AS a negative, it will further reduce their levels and make the problem worse.
It's a Karma Thing
As small children we are trained to say thank you. Generally gently prodded by an adult until we begin to remember to say it on our own. We can all remember a time when we said or heard someone say a very dutiful “thank you.” Somewhere along the way, we come to understand the meaning of that word and our “thank you”s begin to have a bit of feeling behind them.
We learn to say it like we mean it. Most of us learn to say it like we mean it ever when we really don’t. At some point, we reach an age where we always mean it. We might not like the thing that we are saying thank you for but we have become aware that there is underlying thing that deserves the thank you. We appreciate the thought, the gesture, the intent, and that makes the thing itself worthy of a heartfelt and sincere thank you.
For some reason, certain people tend to lose this over time. They regress back through the dutiful repetition of words without meaning to needing a gentle poke, all the way back to not saying it at all. These folks lose their ability to appreciate that which they have and that which they are given. I don’t know what causes this but I know that it almost always goes hand in hand with a sense of entitlement or something similar. People begin to feel like they are “OWED” something and so it loses its value and therefore the recognition of a thank you. This can be something simple, like the husband who becomes so accustomed to having a clean house, neat children, and a nice dinner on the table that he forgets that there is an effort behind all this. He simply is so used to something that it loses its worth….. generally until it stops. Sometimes this is something bigger. Some times someone has such an overwhelming estimation of their worthiness or worth that they think these things are their due.
Both are insidious and both are dangerous. Both can sneak up unawares on a person until you are blind to your own folly. How many folks if asked would say “my significant other knows how much I appreciate them” but when asked the significant other would disagree? How many people are shocked when their mates suddenly up and leave them saying “you don’t appreciate me anymore” or words to that effect?
I think that this is also a symptom of our fast paced society. People are so busy trying to get ahead, trying to get by, or trying to get something else that they fail to recognize what it is that they already HAVE…..
Too Busy Being Fabulous ~~ Eagles
I came home to an empty house
And I found your little note
"Don't wait up for me tonight"
And that was all she wrote
Do you think I don't know that
you're out on the town
With all of your high-rollin' friends?
What do you do when you come up empty?
Where do you go when the party ends?
And you were just too busy being fabulous
Too busy to think about us
I don't know what you were dreaming of
Somehow you forgot about love
And you were just too busy being fabulous, uh-huh
A little time in the country
A day or two to slow down
A bottle of wine and a walk in the moonlight
Maybe some foolin' around
But you think time is just a magazine
And money's just a thrill
I've waited so long for you to
change your way of livin'
Now I realize that you never will
'Cause you were just too busy being fabulous
Too busy to think about us
Lookin' for something you'll never find
You'll never know what you left behind
'Cause you were just too busy
being fabulous, uh-huh
You tell a joke and everybody's laughin'
That's something you know how to do
You've always been the life of the party
But now my baby, the joke is on you
'Cause you were just too busy being fabulous
Too busy to think about us
Running after something that never comes
What in the world are you runnin' from?
And you were just too busy being fabulous
Too busy to think about us
To drink the wine from your winner's cup
To notice the children were growin' up
And you were just too busy being fabulous
Too busy, too busy
Too busy
Aw, baby
I have talked about the need to appreciate what it is that you have. While some men have what they want, it is a lucky man indeed who wants what he has.
Simple appreciation.
Want what you have.
I would like to think that everyone special in my life who has ever done anything that I appreciated knows how much it means. I would like to think that I have always thanked the stranger who held a door for me. I would really like to think that I did but I am sure that there are times that I was distracted, busy, or too self-involved to be bothered but I meant to. I did appreciate it. I can’t count the number of times that someone has rushed ahead or slowed down simply to hold a door for me. But I can say that every single time it happens, I appreciate it. It makes me feel nice that someone does that for you. Because your hands are full, because they are polite, or just because; it is nice to have someone think about you. I would like to think that everyone who ever did that for me (or anything else) knew exactly how it made me feel and how much I appreciated it. I doubt I have always been as thankful as I should have been but I do know that I have tried.
I have a few friends who are the masters at Thank you.
I have a friend who sends a thank you card for everything. Send her an e-mail, she sends you a thank you note. Call her, she sends a note…..
I have a friend who will call up out of the blue and thank me for something from eons ago that they have thanked me for already just because they were thinking about it again.
I have another friend who just is very attentive to everything and says thank you as constantly as some folks clear their throat. She will even thank you for having good weather if she thinks of it. She may not know it but she really makes it nice and easy to be nice to her.
I have a friend who makes it a point to take people aside and thank them for everything. That same friend will thank me for something then at some point in the next day or so they will also leave a voicemail thanking me. It will also be mentioned in an e-mail in a day or so. It isn’t any great feat that prompts this thanks. It is all the little things, any little thing will merit a thank you like this. It makes one very aware of how your actions impact others.
Does any of this CHANGE your actions? Not consciously or at least it shouldn’t but on some level it DOES make you aware. It brings a smile to your face to think you brought a smile to someone else’s and on some level it does influence you to do it again or do it more. Not for the THANKS but for the thought of doing something that makes someone happy.
Two of the most powerful small acts that we can do to influence the world around us, in my opinion, are to smile and say thank you. Seriously. Have you ever been having a bad day and someone smiles at you in a way that just sort of make s you feel better even if only a tiny bit? Likewise have you ever been having a bad day and someone says thank you for something and it just somehow makes you feel better? You can do the reverse too. Have a crappy day and walk around with a snarl and soon even those happy folks around you are starting to get a bit snarly…. Fail to recognize something someone did and they feel unappreciated which makes them a bit snarly too.
This is on my mind today. Yesterday I needed to have a meeting. These are rare for me to schedule a full on official meeting rather than catch, question, and release as I normally do but I needed a group. In fact I needed the entire development team. I have only been working half days so I needed to do it in the morning. They had travel scheduled which forced the meeting to HAVE to be Monday. I found this fact out at 10:45 Monday. I raced around and invited everyone then gathered the necessary items for everyone. I had these massive 2 page spreadsheets (22 by 44 inches per page) that had to be plotted. It was slow going and I finished and raced to the back at 11 on the dot. The guys were there ready to go. We dove in but it was slow going. There were lots of issues that needed discussed. We stayed on course with very minimal distractions. We had to run off a few gate crashers and pull some one back into focus time (two people once each) but we forged ahead. The lunch bell rang and the guys simply said let’s get this done. They struggled through and we got it done by 12:30. I stood and thanked them. I mentioned that if they had any problems they should let me know and we could revisit. Then they all left to get their now shortened lunch.
I dropped my stuff in my office and headed home. I kept thinking about how nice it was that they had skipped their lunch to help me out. It wasn’t one guy, it was a group consensus, they ALL chose to stay as one. I don’t even think one guy came out first and said it, I think they all said it at the same time. So I was running late myself but I stopped on my way home. I darted into the store and bought a box of cookies (bakery not factory) and Klondike bars. Today when the break bell rang, I was there in their area passing those out with a heartfelt thank you to everyone of the guys. Most said the same thing…
“It was nothing”
To which my reply was always the same:
“It meant a lot to me that you were willing to see it through”
There is more to it than that as to why it was on my mind today. While I did stop and get the cookies and ice cream on my way home yesterday, by the time I got to my meeting it was no longer on my mind. I was focused on the task at hand. I was focused on getting my paperwork scofflaw client on track and finishing his taxes so his business did not have to pay a fine and file for an extension. This guy is always behind on paperwork. He always is my last appointment of the tax season because he is never ready. By the end of the appointment, my mind was miles away from my day job. I finished tallying him up and looked at the result. It felt odd but it didn’t quite register. I walked away to get a drink of water and use the restroom. I was refilling my glass a second time when it hit me.
I walked back in and sat down. He said everything looked right and signed where directed. Then I asked if he had a second for friendly conversation. He said eh did. I have known this guy for years and years. We are friends in our way so the remark was not out of line at all. I said this was a personal statement and just my view but that I felt it was important to say. I mentioned that he had been complaining all year that he was not making as much as the previous years. I pointed out that he is down to only one full time employee, a guy that has been with him since day one. He has been telling this guy for years to stick with him, they are building something, and someday it will pay off. He agreed with that. Then I pointed out that his “not making as much” was actually more than previous years. In fact his nets were up OMFG from the previous year. His profits were $Rediculous…. Why? Because his labor had dropped by five employees. This one guy had been carrying the load right along with him. That faithful and loyal employee was making just barely over poverty level. He promptly gave me twenty seven reasons why this guy could not be paid more all of which are viable but I pointed out that this was not my point. It wasn’t about the money per se. I stumbled around a bit then caught my footing and ran with it. He never quite understood what I was getting at. He kept asking me if he should give the guy an under the table raise. I kept countering with appreciate him and show him he makes a difference. He never did quite get it but we ran out of time and he said he would come back to me this week because he WANTED to understand.
This is what has been bothering me. How does one get to this place where you are in a fortuitous position assisted by the grace of others and yet you just can’t see it? This same guy had a partner who helped him to get to where he is in life who he rewarded by trading her in on the newer model who he almost immediately began to complain about. How does that happen? He had a spouse put her life on hold while she shoved him to success that he didn’t appreciate and threw her over for something supposedly better that he STILL didn’t appreciate. He has a long term loyal employee who is underpaid by contract but STILL isn’t appreciated. I don’t think this guy is a bad guy or I wouldn’t be friends with him but I don’t understand this bit of him. How he can be where he is and not SEE the path that took him there. He honestly DOESN’T see it….but he seems to want to. SO I set about thinking on how I might better explain it to him.
These two songs sort of came along for the ride today because I heard them and they seemed to fit.
Hangin’ Around Here ~~ John Hiatt
If I could go back to love's first blush
Oh my lordy it would be a big rush
But I know you can't go back
You gotta keep moving that's a natural fact
So here we are still in love
I swear to you honey by the stars above
It's an old man's dreams that a young man fears
Well I learned that honey just hangin' round here
I'm proud of my mistakes
And all the love and the trouble that I ever did make
I never mean to hurt no one
And when I did it wasn't any fun
But all the roads lead me straight to you
It's all good every little thing that you do
It gets me going just to have you near
Well I learned that honey just hangin' around here
Round here a man has to stand up tall
Round here a man has gotta learn to crawl
Got to go to the bottom to see the top
It's a one way ticket and it never does stop
If I could go back I'd be alone
Cause there's nothing back there just dust and bones
I guess it's you and me
Stumbling to the twenty-first century
My mind's half gone but I don't care
Ain't thinking ahead I'm just getting there
And if you want you can help me steer
Well I learned that honey just hangin' round here
Well I learned that baby just hangin' round here
Well I learned that honey just hangin' round here
Monday, March 3, 2008
Old Skool Red Neck
I know it is hard to believe this but there was a time when I did not have a stove or an oven. It was back in the early days of living by myself at college. I had a snazzy little apartment that had only a fridge/freezer for appliances.
I know some of you are already laughing remembering what's coming. I know ONE of you is falling out of your chair remembering me carrying it home on the BUS.
I had a snazzy little apartment, a fridge, and THIS.......
It was a very SMALL and high tech for the time combination microwave, toaster, convection oven...... and I swear it weighed more than the fridge.
Seems like a mircowave these days weighs nothing...that sucker was heavy and it was a LONG way from the mall for someone who was still hoofing it those days.
But I digress, it made it home at any rate.
It pretty well served its purpose of allowing me to cook most things. I had my toast in the morning, I could nuke leftovers, and I could bake. What more could you want?
Grilled cheese. Or to those of you south of the MD line... that would be a cheese toastie.
I found a work around for that too....eventually. It works!
First, toast your bread.
Now, add your cheese slices to the toast (after removing it from the toaster for the very literal of you)..
Now comes the college genius...
Assemble your sandwich and nuke it for JUST long enough to melt the cheese..... let it sit for a second.
Now eat it. Perfect. For added reality, you can butter both sides of the toast before nuking.
Why bring this up now? Since I have been sick and lazy... I have returned to my red neck roots and cheese toasties made this way.....and it is just as good today.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Andy Walo Group Updates for September 19, 2007
Ok OK, I know I spend a fair amount of time writing about how fantastic, wonderful, and talented I think the Andy Walo Group is. Beyond the fact that they supply me with most of my live music fixes when they are playing around where I happen to be on a given day, they have some really cool things happening in their near future so I thought I might take a minute to share. I will of course be updating these as some of these items get closer.
The first two are the monthly shows at the House of Blues Las Vegas. Yes, It’s that time again. Appearing live Wednesday and Thursday at the Mandalay Bay. If you are in Las Vegas be sure to check these shows out at the House of Blues Cross roads room. There is no cover charge.
Wednesday Night, September 19 - House Of Blues/Las Vegas @ Crossroads Room (Mandalay Bay Hotel) 3950 Las Vegas Blvd. Las Vegas, Nevada 89119 "Nuthin But The Blues Series" 9 PM.
Thursday Night, September 20 - House Of Blues/Las Vegas @ Crossroads Room (Mandalay Bay Hotel) 3950 Las Vegas Blvd. Las Vegas, Nevada 89119 "Unplugged Showcase Series" 10 PM.
The next one is a little bit further out but may require some planning if you wish to attend. You may or may not know that Andy Walo used to play at Harvelle’s Santa Monica “back in the day”. The Andy Walo Group has recently started playing there again and they are going to be recording LIVE during their show on the 27th of this month. At this time I am not certain if they will be recording sound only or sound and video but if you want to be involved consider yourself invited (note: this was a joke, the show/venue is open to the public). Please be aware that tickets are required for this show and can be purchased for $5 from Harvelle’s website.
Thursday Night, September 27 - Harvelle's in Santa Monica; 1432 4 TH Street 9:30 PM. 310-395-1676
Also there are heavy rumors of a show coming up at the LA CO Fair. It seems that the Andy Walo Group may be performing between events at the FreeStyle MotorX event. If they DO perform there, these sets (nine songs total) will be TELEVISED on CBS!! Not sure what the details are and all that but will keep you all posted on this one. Again, if you want to go, be aware that tickets are required (for both the fair AND the event). Let me know and I will guide you for discounts etc.
Saturday, September 29 - FreeStyle Motorcross Event at The Pomona Fairplex
Lastly but not leastly Andy Walo has three of his original songs in the upcoming film, Two Tickets to Paradise. Directed by D.B. Sweeney, which stars Ed Harris and John C. McGinley. The songs are all off the Crunchtime CD and are “Told You So,” “Flamenco Blues,” and “What Happened To My Power.” The soundtrack from this movie looks to be fantastic! It will have songs from Bruce Springsteen, Bob Dylan, Dire Straits, U2, Del Amitri, and Emmy Lou Harris as well as Al Kapone, American Minor, Andy Walo, Bowling for Soup, and Kim Kline. This movie has been shown at a few festivals to rave reviews so watch for it to come to a theater near you.
Note that all pictures are from www.andywalo.com except for the one from Harvelle's Website which is http://www.harvelles.com/Harvelles.html and are subject to copyright.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Kurious About Karma
My religious leanings have never been a secret. I am pretty open about my beliefs and things but this might get a little hairy in spots so….if you might be offended by religion or disturbed by words of illness you might want to skip this blog.
One of the things I am a firm believer in is karma. I have talked about it before on more than one occasion. On this occasion it is a very specific instance and one about which I am curious to know other opinions.
Um the scary illness part. Many of you were around back on that fateful day in June last year and others of you read about it. For summary and those who weren’t here.
On June 6th last year I woke after a few very restless hours sleep. I was seriously disturbed. I was not sure why but I was certain that something was about to go very wrong. As was our way back then, I woke The Man and he jumped in the shower. He was always concerned with my sleep habits so insisted that I always stayed in bed until he was ready to leave. This never flew. I hopped out of bed, made coffee, got things ready for the day, and then hopped back in bed. I lay there trying to get a handle on the feeling I was having and couldn’t. The Man finished his shower and got dressed. He came and sat the edge of the bed and same as every morning I wrapped myself around him and across his lap for a hug. We kissed and cuddled there for a few minutes and then he had to leave. He went to the kitchen and got his coffee then headed for the door. Unable to stand it anymore, I dove out of bed and chased him to the door. I stopped him and hugged him again. With a few more kisses I urged him to be very careful and watched as he walked across the yard to his truck. I stood there uneasy and waved as he pulled out of the drive. I tried to put my concerns out of my mind and get on with my own day. I didn’t have much to do those days as I was still trying to get my leg to work so I could go back to work outside the house. I was just about to get in the shower when I heard my cell phone ring. I picked it up and saw that it was one of The Man’s employees. This usually meant a parts run for me but not today. As I answered the phone with a hello I was greeted with those words that would change my life forever.
“The Man is dead”.
A long story ensues here but as you probably all know by now he was only mostly dead. I prayed as I rushed to the hospital. I prayed as I held on to him for dear life. I prayed as I followed the ambulance that moved him from one hospital to another. I sat there alone in the ICU as I prayed one more time for guidance on the crucial question. You see The Man had always told me he had a living will. He never wanted to be kept alive on life support and yet here we were. The hospital told me he wasn’t going to make it. They told me he might be a vegetable the rest of his life on that damn machine that still to this day makes its erratic clicks, hums, and whistles in my nightmares. The last prayer I made before I gave the OK included a little bit extra beyond the please let him live I had been praying all day and night. There were the added thoughts of I am already sick, If you have to take someone please take me and let him live. Then I gave the Ok and they turned it off. There were a few heartbreaking seconds before he heaved up off the bed and began to breathe on his own. He had done it, he beat the death sentence.
Why is that important? It was while driving him around during his recovery that I began to have trouble seeing. I started to see what I describe as halos. I have always seen auras so don’t be confused. I mean that light began to break up into orb light halos. Polarized sunglasses became a necessity. Driving at night meant trying to avoid traffic to avoid the headaches.
Once The Man was stable I scheduled a physical just to be sure since MS has a symptom of visual disturbances. My doctor started testing that would eventually lead to the discovery of Maxwell. My second “terminal” issue. People often comment on my calm acceptance of this diagnosis. This is why, it is the price I paid to save the life of the man I love and it is worth every bit of price paid even today.
The karma issue comes in next. The Man eventually recovered. He took this illness almost eerily in stride, in fact he ignored it for the most part. He would become irate if you mentioned it. As I got sicker, he got better. He would eventually leave me. There were a whole lot of things that happened in that leaving. None of them were good for me. In short I was unemployed, dying, and he wanted the house which meant I would have to move elsewhere. Shortly thereafter things began to go badly for The Man. He developed an illness of his own, he lost a massive contract that crippled his business, and a variety of other things all bad. One night I mentioned to him that he seemed to have acquired some bad karma. He doesn’t believe in karma and was annoyed I would suggest such a thing. It has persisted over the months. I finally got a job and started working again and helped him with some bids and things that finally started to get some business going for him but not anything big. He accepted that I needed time to get my feet under me before I could move.
He has not held up on some promises he made to me. Notably, he promised to stay my friend and to be there for me. He hasn’t, in fact every time something has happened he has been notably absent. I got very very sick when I did that round of chemo. I had some problems with it to understate things. One night I called him and tried to talk to him. I told him I was very sick. He said he was at the grocery store and asked me about cauliflower. I told him I was in the parking lot of the hospital about to go in to the IC for help. He suddenly told me he had to go and would call me back and hung up. He didn’t. I was nursed through that initial bad reaction to the chemo and sent home. I went and tried to call him with no luck. I toughed it out as best I could. One night I didn’t show up somewhere I was expected and a friend got worried and came to check on me. I was alright but not by much. He made sure I got taken care of and made it a point to check in with me. When The Man found out, he became quite irritated and almost jealous it seemed. He began to call this friend “Big Friend” instead of just “Friend”. It became quite clear that every time I mentioned this friend The Man became jealous. This confused me more as if he had left me, how could he be jealous?
Recently The Man got irritated about something and in a fit of anger told me to go get laid. I got upset and just left the house. The next day he was quite the jerk to me then he disappeared for the weekend as usual. The following week he didn’t come around at all and well into the next week. Then he surfaced one day. Cranky, irate, and surly. He made some smart remark about “Big Friend” that included a reference to sex. I was puzzled and made that clear. He told me that he had heard I was sleeping with “Big Friend”. After I stopped laughing I told him that this was so far from the truth as to be almost hysterical. He finally believed me and things returned to almost normal. I say almost as he still periodically makes jealous sounding statements when the subject of “Big Friend” comes up and will not talk about him or acknowledge he exists.
One day he defended something by “I am your friend and being really nice and understanding with you. I promptly made a big deal about how he had NOT been there for me and how he HAS not been at all understanding or done any of the things he said he would. He was very upset at first but then called me later and said I was absolutely right and he apologized. He made what seemed a sincere effort to try to be better. Things finally began to pan out with the contract bids I had helped with and he got what looked like a potentially huge contract out of one.
I went out of town and upon my return he was again cranky, irate, and surly. Finally I got it out of him that he heard “about my trip”. I knew instantly but ignored the comment but made it clear with a few well chosen trip stories that “Big Friend” had not been involved in my trip and things calmed down again. But he again stopped making an effort to “be there” for me like he had promised. Just last night, I came rushing through the house after work. I was meeting an internet friend for the first time and was running late. As I pulled in the drive I saw The Man’s truck. I parked and rushed in. I said hi as I passed him, I fed the dog, and asked him to make sure she went out before he left. As I headed for the door he asked where I was going. Knowing that mentioning meeting an internet friend would spawn a fight since he disapproves of the blog media, I said the fateful shortcut words, “I have a date”. I trotted out the door and forgot about it.
When I arrived home later, I noticed I had e-mail. I opened it and it was from The Man. It was a list of things he wanted done and wanted done now. It was short, snappish, and not very nice in fact it was pretty horrible. He complained I had not done something the weekend before which was true because I had been sick in bed all weekend which he knew but he was angry anyway. He threatened to make me move even though I am still not yet able to. He questioned if I was even really sick or faking it on order to take advantage of him. I was upset by the nasty tone of the e-mail but sucked it up and replied to each question as if they had been nicely asked and then I went to bed. My phone rang shortly after and it was a friend asking about my day. I lost it and spent the evening crying and talking to him about The Man. I finally fell asleep exhausted and slept for about an hour before waking and having to go to work. I cried all the way to work before getting myself under control.
I came home tonight and rushed around to get ready for a meeting. As I left the house, he was blocking the drive. I asked him to move so I could get out. As he walked to his truck he asked me over his shoulder “so how was your DATE?” in a rude tone. I shrugged and mumbled something as I got in the car and took off. I got back from my meeting a mere 45 minutes later to find three e-mails in my in box. They were all from him ranting about how he lost that big contract today. I can’t help but wonder now.
I find it interesting how when he was loving and kind and with me things were great for him. When he left under such horrible conditions, things went south for him in a big way. As he made an effort to make things right and do what he promised things came around again. Then when he STOPS things go south again….
I think karma is in action, what do you think?.
One of the things I am a firm believer in is karma. I have talked about it before on more than one occasion. On this occasion it is a very specific instance and one about which I am curious to know other opinions.
Um the scary illness part. Many of you were around back on that fateful day in June last year and others of you read about it. For summary and those who weren’t here.
On June 6th last year I woke after a few very restless hours sleep. I was seriously disturbed. I was not sure why but I was certain that something was about to go very wrong. As was our way back then, I woke The Man and he jumped in the shower. He was always concerned with my sleep habits so insisted that I always stayed in bed until he was ready to leave. This never flew. I hopped out of bed, made coffee, got things ready for the day, and then hopped back in bed. I lay there trying to get a handle on the feeling I was having and couldn’t. The Man finished his shower and got dressed. He came and sat the edge of the bed and same as every morning I wrapped myself around him and across his lap for a hug. We kissed and cuddled there for a few minutes and then he had to leave. He went to the kitchen and got his coffee then headed for the door. Unable to stand it anymore, I dove out of bed and chased him to the door. I stopped him and hugged him again. With a few more kisses I urged him to be very careful and watched as he walked across the yard to his truck. I stood there uneasy and waved as he pulled out of the drive. I tried to put my concerns out of my mind and get on with my own day. I didn’t have much to do those days as I was still trying to get my leg to work so I could go back to work outside the house. I was just about to get in the shower when I heard my cell phone ring. I picked it up and saw that it was one of The Man’s employees. This usually meant a parts run for me but not today. As I answered the phone with a hello I was greeted with those words that would change my life forever.
“The Man is dead”.
A long story ensues here but as you probably all know by now he was only mostly dead. I prayed as I rushed to the hospital. I prayed as I held on to him for dear life. I prayed as I followed the ambulance that moved him from one hospital to another. I sat there alone in the ICU as I prayed one more time for guidance on the crucial question. You see The Man had always told me he had a living will. He never wanted to be kept alive on life support and yet here we were. The hospital told me he wasn’t going to make it. They told me he might be a vegetable the rest of his life on that damn machine that still to this day makes its erratic clicks, hums, and whistles in my nightmares. The last prayer I made before I gave the OK included a little bit extra beyond the please let him live I had been praying all day and night. There were the added thoughts of I am already sick, If you have to take someone please take me and let him live. Then I gave the Ok and they turned it off. There were a few heartbreaking seconds before he heaved up off the bed and began to breathe on his own. He had done it, he beat the death sentence.
Why is that important? It was while driving him around during his recovery that I began to have trouble seeing. I started to see what I describe as halos. I have always seen auras so don’t be confused. I mean that light began to break up into orb light halos. Polarized sunglasses became a necessity. Driving at night meant trying to avoid traffic to avoid the headaches.
Once The Man was stable I scheduled a physical just to be sure since MS has a symptom of visual disturbances. My doctor started testing that would eventually lead to the discovery of Maxwell. My second “terminal” issue. People often comment on my calm acceptance of this diagnosis. This is why, it is the price I paid to save the life of the man I love and it is worth every bit of price paid even today.
The karma issue comes in next. The Man eventually recovered. He took this illness almost eerily in stride, in fact he ignored it for the most part. He would become irate if you mentioned it. As I got sicker, he got better. He would eventually leave me. There were a whole lot of things that happened in that leaving. None of them were good for me. In short I was unemployed, dying, and he wanted the house which meant I would have to move elsewhere. Shortly thereafter things began to go badly for The Man. He developed an illness of his own, he lost a massive contract that crippled his business, and a variety of other things all bad. One night I mentioned to him that he seemed to have acquired some bad karma. He doesn’t believe in karma and was annoyed I would suggest such a thing. It has persisted over the months. I finally got a job and started working again and helped him with some bids and things that finally started to get some business going for him but not anything big. He accepted that I needed time to get my feet under me before I could move.
He has not held up on some promises he made to me. Notably, he promised to stay my friend and to be there for me. He hasn’t, in fact every time something has happened he has been notably absent. I got very very sick when I did that round of chemo. I had some problems with it to understate things. One night I called him and tried to talk to him. I told him I was very sick. He said he was at the grocery store and asked me about cauliflower. I told him I was in the parking lot of the hospital about to go in to the IC for help. He suddenly told me he had to go and would call me back and hung up. He didn’t. I was nursed through that initial bad reaction to the chemo and sent home. I went and tried to call him with no luck. I toughed it out as best I could. One night I didn’t show up somewhere I was expected and a friend got worried and came to check on me. I was alright but not by much. He made sure I got taken care of and made it a point to check in with me. When The Man found out, he became quite irritated and almost jealous it seemed. He began to call this friend “Big Friend” instead of just “Friend”. It became quite clear that every time I mentioned this friend The Man became jealous. This confused me more as if he had left me, how could he be jealous?
Recently The Man got irritated about something and in a fit of anger told me to go get laid. I got upset and just left the house. The next day he was quite the jerk to me then he disappeared for the weekend as usual. The following week he didn’t come around at all and well into the next week. Then he surfaced one day. Cranky, irate, and surly. He made some smart remark about “Big Friend” that included a reference to sex. I was puzzled and made that clear. He told me that he had heard I was sleeping with “Big Friend”. After I stopped laughing I told him that this was so far from the truth as to be almost hysterical. He finally believed me and things returned to almost normal. I say almost as he still periodically makes jealous sounding statements when the subject of “Big Friend” comes up and will not talk about him or acknowledge he exists.
One day he defended something by “I am your friend and being really nice and understanding with you. I promptly made a big deal about how he had NOT been there for me and how he HAS not been at all understanding or done any of the things he said he would. He was very upset at first but then called me later and said I was absolutely right and he apologized. He made what seemed a sincere effort to try to be better. Things finally began to pan out with the contract bids I had helped with and he got what looked like a potentially huge contract out of one.
I went out of town and upon my return he was again cranky, irate, and surly. Finally I got it out of him that he heard “about my trip”. I knew instantly but ignored the comment but made it clear with a few well chosen trip stories that “Big Friend” had not been involved in my trip and things calmed down again. But he again stopped making an effort to “be there” for me like he had promised. Just last night, I came rushing through the house after work. I was meeting an internet friend for the first time and was running late. As I pulled in the drive I saw The Man’s truck. I parked and rushed in. I said hi as I passed him, I fed the dog, and asked him to make sure she went out before he left. As I headed for the door he asked where I was going. Knowing that mentioning meeting an internet friend would spawn a fight since he disapproves of the blog media, I said the fateful shortcut words, “I have a date”. I trotted out the door and forgot about it.
When I arrived home later, I noticed I had e-mail. I opened it and it was from The Man. It was a list of things he wanted done and wanted done now. It was short, snappish, and not very nice in fact it was pretty horrible. He complained I had not done something the weekend before which was true because I had been sick in bed all weekend which he knew but he was angry anyway. He threatened to make me move even though I am still not yet able to. He questioned if I was even really sick or faking it on order to take advantage of him. I was upset by the nasty tone of the e-mail but sucked it up and replied to each question as if they had been nicely asked and then I went to bed. My phone rang shortly after and it was a friend asking about my day. I lost it and spent the evening crying and talking to him about The Man. I finally fell asleep exhausted and slept for about an hour before waking and having to go to work. I cried all the way to work before getting myself under control.
I came home tonight and rushed around to get ready for a meeting. As I left the house, he was blocking the drive. I asked him to move so I could get out. As he walked to his truck he asked me over his shoulder “so how was your DATE?” in a rude tone. I shrugged and mumbled something as I got in the car and took off. I got back from my meeting a mere 45 minutes later to find three e-mails in my in box. They were all from him ranting about how he lost that big contract today. I can’t help but wonder now.
I find it interesting how when he was loving and kind and with me things were great for him. When he left under such horrible conditions, things went south for him in a big way. As he made an effort to make things right and do what he promised things came around again. Then when he STOPS things go south again….
I think karma is in action, what do you think?.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Wild hair on Wednesday July 18,2007
honestly have to say, I can’t think of one single dang thing to write about today. My mind is jumping all over like a needle across a scratchy old LP. I am trying to just sit and type and hope something coherent comes out. Most likely not but maybe I will hit something if I just start blabbing about what is on my mind because I really need to get some of it off my mind.
Some of the material that is on my mind, makes me feel the need to use the little disclaimer thingy….
I am going to hedge my bets here and rather than field comments later here comes the disclaimer.
1) I am talking about myself and MY OWN opinions here. I am not even remotely suggesting that I feel the same about anyone else nor that anyone else should feel the same.
2) This blog might contain “language”
3) This blog might be viewed as offensive or poking fun at handicaps or disease…see #1.
4) Some of you may have heard some of this before. For you I say, thanks for the practice reminding myself and allowing me to vent or describe to you.
5) Please no one freak if this is the first you have seen these sorts of comments from me.
Death and dying: It happens, in fact it seems to be all around me these days. I find it amazing that people seem to have very weird and diverse thoughts on the subject. I actually saw one today where the response to “my dad died” was… “oh, such a bummer” and another elsewhere was “Death is tragic and so sad!”. I find it amazing many times that people preface a condolence with a religious type comment and then go on and on about how sorry that they are that the person died. Maybe it is my own personal weirdness but I find that confusing. If you are a religious person (and some who aren’t) don’t you believe in an afterlife? If you believe in an afterlife of any kind, isn’t it a good thing that some one “moved on to their reward”? I honestly believe that the only sadness to be associated with death is for the ones who are left behind. They are the ones who suffered and lost after all. The should be no sadness in death only loss to this mortal plane. The definition of the “afterlife” and stuff should be left for another day cause I am rather pissy about it today.
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TV and Radio: What ever happened to quality TV programming? I miss all those old shows (Schoolhouse Rock, electric company… anyone?). I seldom find anything these days that makes it worth even turning on the TV. People get cranky when I say that. That’s right, I don’t watch TV, it is not anything other than lack of interest in what is on, nothing more, no message. Along these same lines I love music and yet hardly ever turn on the radio. Why? The commercials and the format drive me insane. Why do I need to listen to four thousand commercials for every ONE song? For that matter, why do I need to listen to some YAAWHo blabber on endlessly about crap in between the songs? And with all the tons of fantastic music out there WHY OH WHY do you only play the SAME thirty some songs OVER AND FREAKING OVER….. Here is what I want out of a station. Pick a genre, put every song in that genre on random play, and let ‘er rip. If you HAVE to talk, when the song is over, tell me who it was, the title and if you really have to still say something give me some thing about the song….then shut up and play the next one. Keep your dumb commercials to yourself…. I would listen to a station like that… Oh wait. I already do. Have I mentioned lately that I LOVE Sirius radio? Yeah, I do, almost as much as I love my CD changer.
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Dogs and pets: They are annoying, they sure can rack up the vet bills, they are like perma-children, and they sure can destroy a home…but they also sure are great. They are always happy to see you, even though you can’t always tell with some cats, they listen without ever arguing or complaining, they really don’t care what you look like, and they love you unconditionally.
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Flirting: I have seen this subject around a bunch lately too. From my perspective there have been two common themes about it. One is the theme of “shame shame you shouldn’t be doing that.” And the other is the theme of “oh sorry, I didn’t mean to offend.”. The first theme of shame shame; whats up with that? When did flirting become naughty or shameful? Flirting is a fun banter of a slightly “sexual” nature. AND????? It does not mean that you are going to run off and actually HAVE sex with the person. Sheesh. I flirt with quite a few people and some are married, some are single, some are male, some are female, some are older, and some are younger. It does not mean that I have any interest in these folks other than fun banter. Those of you who were yelling shame, just have dirty minds or something. Flirting does not equal sex. Flirting does not equal INTENT. Flirting is words, nothing more and nothing less. Get over it there is nothing wrong with flirting without intent. Now, to those who feel the need to apologize for flirting…. Why? Are there people who actually get upset if you flirt with them? If so I am in trouble. I flirt with pretty much anyone, randomly, and without asking… oops. I flirt with a lot of folks and I further confess that I have no interest in “sexual relations” with most of them (sad I know, stop crying). Some folks are just good flirters. Some flirters are kind of low key about it and some are downright blushy about it. I am not very good at it sometimes, but I try. Some folks just make it easier to flirt with them or bring that out better than others. Flirting is fun if it is kept CLEAN. Flirting is NOT fun when it becomes pornographic so please don’t send me pictures of naked bits, please don’t tell me in graphic details what you wish to do, and for goodness sakes, keep your clothes on. Other than that, please feel free to flirt. If I think it is a problem I will let you know, until then, don’t apologize for it and please don’t tell me how “wrong” it is.
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Truth: why is it that people will ask you something and NOT want to hear the answer? Or worse yet those people who INSIST that you be “brutally honest” with them and then get angry when you are? Why ask a question at all if you don’t want to know the answer? Why not simply say, “hey lie to me and tell me this looks great on me!” Or “Pretend I just asked you how your day was and pretend I listened intently.” “feeling down today, blow air up my skirt and tell me how fantastic I am..” I mean seriously. I would much rather someone simply be honest with me. I might not LIKE the answer but I want to know the truth. I have certain friends who I won’t go shopping with no matter how many times they ask, beg, or plead. Why? Besides the fact I HATE shopping, I hate going shopping with people who insist on dragging over to the fitting room while they try on stuff and ask your opinion. Then when you reply “yes honey it is a great dress but it doesn’t work so well on your body style” they blow a gasket. I’m sorry I missed the class in “girl school” where you are supposed to let your friend walk around looking like an idiot rather than politely say… “not for you dear.” More than that, I really hate when people will tell you ANYTHING looks great on you. Don’t laugh, I have tested this theory with some SERIOUSLY out there weird stuff and there are certain people who if they go shopping with me, I completely ignore their advice. The same holds for serious stuff too not just the fluff. Ever try to tell a friend that their significant other has a “bad habit”? Regardless of how bad the habit is, they get mad at who? Yeah, you. Still battling this with several family members DESPITE the fact that they have since told others “yeah, she was right” and I have NEVER EVER gone up to anyone and gone “told you so…”. Truth is truth. And once said, it is never grounds for gloating, nor is it something you should take lightly, nor is it anything that should ever be used against someone. Truth is not always nice but it should be treated nicely. You don’t have to be mean to be honest. Likewise you don’t always have to blurt the truth every second either sometimes the best answer is still to simply shut your mouth.
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Religion: Ok so I said I wasn’t going here, but I am anyway… I want someone to quote me CHAPTER and VERSE of where exactly it says in the bible (a REAL one, not necessarily a Christian one but ANY real one as opposed to a “modified one”) that if you do not follow a SPECIFIC RELIGION you are not going to heaven. I have read a lot of different bibles in my time. I went to parochial schools so I read in entirety both the King James and the New Revised Standard version. I also read parts of the “translated” Torah, I have read the catholic version, the Living Bible, as well as the Vedas. I have read bits of the religious texts of almost all the eastern religions. Religion and the understanding of the similarities and differences is a HUGE deal in my family. It has been for generations so I have a fair understanding of lots of them. The one thing I have NEVER seen in these texts is any sort of note that says, if your practice these beliefs in a different manner you are more (or less) holy and therefore will (or will not) go on to the afterlife. It simply IS not there. All these religious books have ONE very clear point: The NATURE of GOD and how you should and should not act. There is nothing in them that outlines all the rites and other things that make up organized religions. Those things are all WAYS of worship that were devised by MAN. That is not to say that they are right or wrong just that they are NOT the will of god. I want to point out as well that ALL these books also have something else in common, they are all the retelling of things by MAN. They may have had divine inspiration but none of these works was penned by God himself. To those “Christians” who believe that ANY non-Christian will not go to heaven, I would like to remind you…Jesus was a Jew, how do you explain that he sits on the “right hand of God” if non-Christians don’t go to heaven? Is it really so difficult to see that all religions are essentially the same? The rites and traditions vary as does the terminology to describe things but underneath it all they are ALL about the same thing, faith in a single higher ultimate power.
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Alcoholic Drinks:…. Perhaps I will have one tonight…. I have a top five list of drinks and it includes Margaritas, Daiquiris, Gin and Tonic, SoCo (or B&B depending on the season), and Gin Maritinis (sad that you have to add the “gin” these days). I love margaritas….on the rocks, light salt please…. I never used to order my margarita with light salt. I like the salt but not a lot of it in my drink even though my doctor tells me to eat more salt. Funny thing is that one of the FEW ways my dad and I are different is this one. He LOVES salt on his and can never seem to get enough to last the drink so he has a funny habit of reaching over and stealing a lick off my glass then drinking his own. It works for both of us. If he is not around I have to remember to ask for light salt or wipe it off. I also love daiquiris. They are yummy in all their wonderful flavors. I was quite sad to find this weekend that the ONLY good daiquiri shop around here is no longer owned by the NOLA institution of the Giacomo family. It is now owned by someone else and the daiquiri machines that used to line the walls are gone. In fact, they don’t even sell them anymore. I was sad. It had become just another yuppy bar. Maybe someday I will buy a bar and have my own herd of daiquiri machines along with all the old traditional drinks that are getting more difficult to order these days. They are actually advertising “classic” bars as a selling point so you can walk in off the street and not have to explain how to make a gin and tonic to the bartender. No offense to bar tenders, when all you get asked for is kiddie cocktails, that is what you are going to know how to make best.
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Ok, Now I really NEED that drink because it makes all the rest of this stuff easier to deal with…or at least you feel that way…. (kidding, sheesh, call off the intervention)….
Some of the material that is on my mind, makes me feel the need to use the little disclaimer thingy….
I am going to hedge my bets here and rather than field comments later here comes the disclaimer.
1) I am talking about myself and MY OWN opinions here. I am not even remotely suggesting that I feel the same about anyone else nor that anyone else should feel the same.
2) This blog might contain “language”
3) This blog might be viewed as offensive or poking fun at handicaps or disease…see #1.
4) Some of you may have heard some of this before. For you I say, thanks for the practice reminding myself and allowing me to vent or describe to you.
5) Please no one freak if this is the first you have seen these sorts of comments from me.
Death and dying: It happens, in fact it seems to be all around me these days. I find it amazing that people seem to have very weird and diverse thoughts on the subject. I actually saw one today where the response to “my dad died” was… “oh, such a bummer” and another elsewhere was “Death is tragic and so sad!”. I find it amazing many times that people preface a condolence with a religious type comment and then go on and on about how sorry that they are that the person died. Maybe it is my own personal weirdness but I find that confusing. If you are a religious person (and some who aren’t) don’t you believe in an afterlife? If you believe in an afterlife of any kind, isn’t it a good thing that some one “moved on to their reward”? I honestly believe that the only sadness to be associated with death is for the ones who are left behind. They are the ones who suffered and lost after all. The should be no sadness in death only loss to this mortal plane. The definition of the “afterlife” and stuff should be left for another day cause I am rather pissy about it today.
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TV and Radio: What ever happened to quality TV programming? I miss all those old shows (Schoolhouse Rock, electric company… anyone?). I seldom find anything these days that makes it worth even turning on the TV. People get cranky when I say that. That’s right, I don’t watch TV, it is not anything other than lack of interest in what is on, nothing more, no message. Along these same lines I love music and yet hardly ever turn on the radio. Why? The commercials and the format drive me insane. Why do I need to listen to four thousand commercials for every ONE song? For that matter, why do I need to listen to some YAAWHo blabber on endlessly about crap in between the songs? And with all the tons of fantastic music out there WHY OH WHY do you only play the SAME thirty some songs OVER AND FREAKING OVER….. Here is what I want out of a station. Pick a genre, put every song in that genre on random play, and let ‘er rip. If you HAVE to talk, when the song is over, tell me who it was, the title and if you really have to still say something give me some thing about the song….then shut up and play the next one. Keep your dumb commercials to yourself…. I would listen to a station like that… Oh wait. I already do. Have I mentioned lately that I LOVE Sirius radio? Yeah, I do, almost as much as I love my CD changer.
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Dogs and pets: They are annoying, they sure can rack up the vet bills, they are like perma-children, and they sure can destroy a home…but they also sure are great. They are always happy to see you, even though you can’t always tell with some cats, they listen without ever arguing or complaining, they really don’t care what you look like, and they love you unconditionally.
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Flirting: I have seen this subject around a bunch lately too. From my perspective there have been two common themes about it. One is the theme of “shame shame you shouldn’t be doing that.” And the other is the theme of “oh sorry, I didn’t mean to offend.”. The first theme of shame shame; whats up with that? When did flirting become naughty or shameful? Flirting is a fun banter of a slightly “sexual” nature. AND????? It does not mean that you are going to run off and actually HAVE sex with the person. Sheesh. I flirt with quite a few people and some are married, some are single, some are male, some are female, some are older, and some are younger. It does not mean that I have any interest in these folks other than fun banter. Those of you who were yelling shame, just have dirty minds or something. Flirting does not equal sex. Flirting does not equal INTENT. Flirting is words, nothing more and nothing less. Get over it there is nothing wrong with flirting without intent. Now, to those who feel the need to apologize for flirting…. Why? Are there people who actually get upset if you flirt with them? If so I am in trouble. I flirt with pretty much anyone, randomly, and without asking… oops. I flirt with a lot of folks and I further confess that I have no interest in “sexual relations” with most of them (sad I know, stop crying). Some folks are just good flirters. Some flirters are kind of low key about it and some are downright blushy about it. I am not very good at it sometimes, but I try. Some folks just make it easier to flirt with them or bring that out better than others. Flirting is fun if it is kept CLEAN. Flirting is NOT fun when it becomes pornographic so please don’t send me pictures of naked bits, please don’t tell me in graphic details what you wish to do, and for goodness sakes, keep your clothes on. Other than that, please feel free to flirt. If I think it is a problem I will let you know, until then, don’t apologize for it and please don’t tell me how “wrong” it is.
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Truth: why is it that people will ask you something and NOT want to hear the answer? Or worse yet those people who INSIST that you be “brutally honest” with them and then get angry when you are? Why ask a question at all if you don’t want to know the answer? Why not simply say, “hey lie to me and tell me this looks great on me!” Or “Pretend I just asked you how your day was and pretend I listened intently.” “feeling down today, blow air up my skirt and tell me how fantastic I am..” I mean seriously. I would much rather someone simply be honest with me. I might not LIKE the answer but I want to know the truth. I have certain friends who I won’t go shopping with no matter how many times they ask, beg, or plead. Why? Besides the fact I HATE shopping, I hate going shopping with people who insist on dragging over to the fitting room while they try on stuff and ask your opinion. Then when you reply “yes honey it is a great dress but it doesn’t work so well on your body style” they blow a gasket. I’m sorry I missed the class in “girl school” where you are supposed to let your friend walk around looking like an idiot rather than politely say… “not for you dear.” More than that, I really hate when people will tell you ANYTHING looks great on you. Don’t laugh, I have tested this theory with some SERIOUSLY out there weird stuff and there are certain people who if they go shopping with me, I completely ignore their advice. The same holds for serious stuff too not just the fluff. Ever try to tell a friend that their significant other has a “bad habit”? Regardless of how bad the habit is, they get mad at who? Yeah, you. Still battling this with several family members DESPITE the fact that they have since told others “yeah, she was right” and I have NEVER EVER gone up to anyone and gone “told you so…”. Truth is truth. And once said, it is never grounds for gloating, nor is it something you should take lightly, nor is it anything that should ever be used against someone. Truth is not always nice but it should be treated nicely. You don’t have to be mean to be honest. Likewise you don’t always have to blurt the truth every second either sometimes the best answer is still to simply shut your mouth.
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Religion: Ok so I said I wasn’t going here, but I am anyway… I want someone to quote me CHAPTER and VERSE of where exactly it says in the bible (a REAL one, not necessarily a Christian one but ANY real one as opposed to a “modified one”) that if you do not follow a SPECIFIC RELIGION you are not going to heaven. I have read a lot of different bibles in my time. I went to parochial schools so I read in entirety both the King James and the New Revised Standard version. I also read parts of the “translated” Torah, I have read the catholic version, the Living Bible, as well as the Vedas. I have read bits of the religious texts of almost all the eastern religions. Religion and the understanding of the similarities and differences is a HUGE deal in my family. It has been for generations so I have a fair understanding of lots of them. The one thing I have NEVER seen in these texts is any sort of note that says, if your practice these beliefs in a different manner you are more (or less) holy and therefore will (or will not) go on to the afterlife. It simply IS not there. All these religious books have ONE very clear point: The NATURE of GOD and how you should and should not act. There is nothing in them that outlines all the rites and other things that make up organized religions. Those things are all WAYS of worship that were devised by MAN. That is not to say that they are right or wrong just that they are NOT the will of god. I want to point out as well that ALL these books also have something else in common, they are all the retelling of things by MAN. They may have had divine inspiration but none of these works was penned by God himself. To those “Christians” who believe that ANY non-Christian will not go to heaven, I would like to remind you…Jesus was a Jew, how do you explain that he sits on the “right hand of God” if non-Christians don’t go to heaven? Is it really so difficult to see that all religions are essentially the same? The rites and traditions vary as does the terminology to describe things but underneath it all they are ALL about the same thing, faith in a single higher ultimate power.
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Alcoholic Drinks:…. Perhaps I will have one tonight…. I have a top five list of drinks and it includes Margaritas, Daiquiris, Gin and Tonic, SoCo (or B&B depending on the season), and Gin Maritinis (sad that you have to add the “gin” these days). I love margaritas….on the rocks, light salt please…. I never used to order my margarita with light salt. I like the salt but not a lot of it in my drink even though my doctor tells me to eat more salt. Funny thing is that one of the FEW ways my dad and I are different is this one. He LOVES salt on his and can never seem to get enough to last the drink so he has a funny habit of reaching over and stealing a lick off my glass then drinking his own. It works for both of us. If he is not around I have to remember to ask for light salt or wipe it off. I also love daiquiris. They are yummy in all their wonderful flavors. I was quite sad to find this weekend that the ONLY good daiquiri shop around here is no longer owned by the NOLA institution of the Giacomo family. It is now owned by someone else and the daiquiri machines that used to line the walls are gone. In fact, they don’t even sell them anymore. I was sad. It had become just another yuppy bar. Maybe someday I will buy a bar and have my own herd of daiquiri machines along with all the old traditional drinks that are getting more difficult to order these days. They are actually advertising “classic” bars as a selling point so you can walk in off the street and not have to explain how to make a gin and tonic to the bartender. No offense to bar tenders, when all you get asked for is kiddie cocktails, that is what you are going to know how to make best.
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Ok, Now I really NEED that drink because it makes all the rest of this stuff easier to deal with…or at least you feel that way…. (kidding, sheesh, call off the intervention)….
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